Notes From Gordon 250112: Encomiums Are Pouring In!

ATTENTION SPAN NOTICE
Reading time: 603 words @ 238 wpm = 2 minutes, 32 seconds

TONE: light and fluffy, surreptitiously self-promotional

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A Day In The Life Of Your Septuagenarian Scribe

Each morning upon awakening and confirming that I am still alive:

• I check that my limbs are functioning and get out of bed.

• I attend to my morning micturation and ablution.

• I brew two cups of coffee to assure communication between hemispheres.

• I check the news to make sure Civil War 2.0 hasn’t started without me.

• I sit down at my trusty PC.

• And something to write about always comes to me.

In my entire life I have never experienced writer’s block. In fact it’s all I can do to decide which of the many ideas swirling around in my head to tackle next.

I am reminded of Hedley Lamarr in the movie, Blazing Saddles, who famously said:

"My mind is aglow with whirling, transient nodes of thought, careening through a cosmic vapor of invention."

Should I write about…

• Joe Biden’s latex mask?

• How DMSO is great for strokes, chapped lips and rectal inflammation?

• Elon Musk’s obvious rush to colonize Mars in advance of the coming geomagnetic polar reversal and apocalypse?

• Why women seek to change men... and they don’t. Or why men hope for women never to change… and they do?

Good Lord, how can I keep up with all of this?

Come to think of it, is anybody actually reading this stuff? Or is this merely an exercise in catharsis?

And what about the risk of self-gratification? After all, I did have my ego surgically removed back in ‘91, but the doctors said they couldn’t quite get it all.

So many thoughts, so little time…

And then, in a moment of acute omphaloskepsis as I consider brewing a third cup (boy, I really need to pee now), I get some nice notes in my inbox telling me that I’m doing a good job.

“YOU ARE the BEST! Loving your daily missives! That trailer to the Lego movie... Oh Lordy!!!!”

“I'm enjoying yer daily snippets... more easily assimilated than your more comprehensive tomes...

“Your daily posts are a joy to read… the wit of it bring me at least a couple of minutes to smile and snicker… You could do a great service to the world by creating a book of these short chapters…”

Gosh, thanks, everyone!

I really do love writing. As a musician I had just 12 notes to work with. Now I have 26 letters, plus CAPITALS and p:u;n/c,t\u|a>t<i.o-n

What’s not to like?

Speaking of which, I really do need to write about the Holocaust®, the terrorist creation of the state of Israel with funding from the Rothschilds, the true ending of World War II when Joe Stalin’s boys raped every woman still living in Germany, and how a sensitive, young German artist and war hero with a handlebar moustache and nationalist bent almost stopped the globalists in their tracks.

Nah, why ruin a winning streak with a little too much reality?

I think tomorrow I’ll play it safe and write about something light and fluffy… like that time I presented to an audience of 5,000 at the Luxor Hotel in Las Vegas on “How To Have a Free Baby” and the FBI tried to jam our wireless mics like a scene from the old “Get Smart” TV sitcom.

Enjoy your Sunday,

Gordon

RISE Meetup Sunday 01/12

• 8:00PM ET (sorry about last week… I messed up!)

• www.ZoomWithGordon.com

• ‘California burnin': Arson or DEW?

• DMSO: A true health miracle

• Open discussion to follow…